Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
