Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
