trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
