i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
