on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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