i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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