Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
