I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I need to sanitize my soul.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Randomize
