A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Randomize