I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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