He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
