JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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