I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
