is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
