Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
