pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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