North Korea, Best Korea!
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
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