I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Randomize
