she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I will be naked everywhere
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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