But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
only you would photoshop your dick
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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