I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I love you. Go after that dick
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
