so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
