I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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