i think my mom watched the whole time
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
