you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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