hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
