i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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