Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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