So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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