He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Green mimosas i think yes
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
