just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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