some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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