Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
