I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
