Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize