He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
