anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
