1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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