I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
It all started with a game of naked twister.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
