Non-Jews are for practice
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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