I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
