so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
