i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
