You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
