you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Randomize
