yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
