You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
