All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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