Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
