Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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